Category Archives: Lesbian Adventure Club fiction

Living Dead(heads) ready to stand

Woohoo, the author has completed the first draft of LAC 20! Now, she goes back to word one, but she usually busts butt to get it to third draft. That said, I suspect it will be ready for public consumption by mid-September. Then, she can take care of these wandering characters in here who are in desperate need of closure. Pity for them. Elation for us.

I will keep you posted!

 

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LAC 17 Update

She finally finished LAC 17, and now it’ll move on to editing. It has a title, a cover, and a blurb. We are getting there! It should be ready by month’s end, but keep in mind she still has a couple of those major life events on the horizon. With those things, you never frickin’ know.

LAC 17 cover

Blurb: Kate and Claudia are sick and tired of LAC weekends sending them through an emotional wringer. As this month’s hostesses, they have vowed to avoid their typical wussy ways and do nothing less than mess with the crew. Can they pull it off, or is the deck stacked against them?

 

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Another Swipe

Well, the cosmos has seen to dumping a shitload of “major life events” on our author. Nasty ones. Good ones. A couple big ones still pending. So despite the fact that she no longer owns a bikini, she has been riding the waves, and not a whole lot more. We’ve been behaving, and we simply welcome her back when she gets to the keyboard to help us on our way. It’s strange to be her solace and not the pain in her posterior. We’ll deal.

But, because she’s been feeling guilty about keeping you guys hanging, I decided to swipe another chapter. She’s here, kind of, and typing as fast as she can.

In the meantime…

Chapter 3

“‘Crazy Eights’?” Holly gasped. “What the heck does that mean?”

“Isn’t Crazy Eights a card game?”

“We’re going to spend the weekend playing cards?”

“Shush and listen,” Claudia yelled. “Kate, lay the rules on them.”

Feeling more confident than I had all day, I reminded, “The bags of bucks and beads are for purchasing meals and beverages. That’s the simple rule.” I cleared my throat and quickly recalled what was my job to cover. “In the spirit of Crazy Eights, you are required to speak in sentences of exactly eight words. If what you need to say requires less than eight words, you need to fill it in until it does. If what you need to say requires more than eight words, you must pause for eight seconds after the eighth word and then continue with another eight words, and so on.” I stopped to let that sink in, because I wasn’t sure there was even a way to explain it without it being confusing.

Apparently, they were brighter than I figured because no hands shot up with the bazillion questions I had anticipated.

I opened my mouth to proceed to the next rule, when Laura’s voice crackled out of Holly’s phone, “Give us an example, Sutter.”

Continue reading Another Swipe

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Swiping Time Again

Well, she got out of Camp NanoWriMo with an extra 5,000 words beyond her goal. She focused mostly on Laura’s book, but the DWD did manage to wrangle some attention out of her. She’s now in Chapter 10, with quite a way to go yet, and I must tell you that it has been hard keeping in at the keyboard when it’s beautiful outside. I think I’d rather deal with her wanting to plant things than being crabby as hell with spring fever in the absence of spring. So, we’ll let her live a little but keep nagging as well—gently nagging.

In the meantime, here’s Chapter 2 of LAC 17. If you haven’t read Chapter 1 or need a refresher, read it first via the post below this one.

 

Chapter 2

Shortly after ten—hell, longly after ten, I finally heard the sound of a motor up the driveway. Let it be Claudia, I chanted as though a three-year-old moron. I did not want to frickin’ host this frickin’ thing by my frickin’ lonesome!

Ginny and Kris’ van finally came into view, and my heart sank, only to be quickly buoyed by the fact that Laura had said maybe they could swing by and get her. Please, let them have Claudia!

I rushed the van while trying hard not to look as though I was actually rushing the van. I wasn’t at all sure how I did. Probably not very well, for the side door flung open, and Holly stared at me.

“Did you get Claudia?” I asked as I tried to spy through windows made opaque by intense sunshine.

“No!” she shrieked, and I could not have imagined her being quite that upset over her best friend’s absence.

“Sorry, Dilly,” Maggie yelled. “She’s still at work.”

“And we’re late because Ginny got lost,” the redhead informed, just as the passenger door opened fully.

The psychologist jumped out. Shaking her head, she looked exasperated, but I knew she suppressed laughter.

I called to Ginny, “Claudia and I got lost the first time, too. You should have called me.”

“I got us here!” she replied. “We just took the scenic route. It’s beautiful out here.”

“It sure is,” Kris said.

Those in the back came barreling out, and Holly raced to me and threw her arms around me. She released a godawful sigh just as her head came to rest on my shoulder. Melodrama or what?

Continue reading Swiping Time Again

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LAC 14 Chapter 1

Okay, I swiped Chapter 1 from the book that still does not have a title. It is not final draft, but we’ll make that our own little secret.

At the end of your reading, you will find, as promised, a link to the telltale, mood-setting music.

 

Chapter 1

“Kate! Quit arguing, honey, and just pull over!”

Jesus, I hated it went things went wrong before a Lesbian Adventure Club weekend had even officially begun.

“Fine,” I barked at her. I slowed far too quickly and lurched into a convenience store’s parking lot. I shoved the car into park, saying, “I really don’t think I was driving that badly.”

“Honey, you always think you drive okay without shoes on.”

That’s because I frickin’ do, Claudia! But, I shut my mouth, even going so far as to resist the urge to point out how poorly I could have driven had I been wearing three-foot-long clown shoes. Regardless, and for the record—the DWD record, not the DMV record—I was not a bad driver. Granted, I was not as overly cautious as she was, and okay, I had somewhat of a lead foot … whose weight was a hell of a lot harder to gauge without a shoe at the weigh-in.

She unbuckled her seatbelt, twisted around, and came pretty damn close to sliding right into the backseat. I thought to help her but proved able to rein in my inner scoundrel just in time. I was already starting out the day on the wrong foot, and I desperately needed it to start out on the right one. Sock, clown, lead: It didn’t matter which. It just mattered that it did, and my testy attitude was not helping.

So, I distracted myself: I stared at her butt. While that normally would have been a good thing, a splendid thing, I instead found myself wondering how I ever convinced her that the gaudy plaid did not make her butt look bigger. Truth be told, it did. I was sure it was not anywhere near the grotesque proportions she believed, but, yes, gaudy plaid widened her load. Still, it was a damn glorious thing to behold, and I felt better.

Continue reading LAC 14 Chapter 1

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You Will Get Sutures Tomorrow

Okay, that post title sounds horrid … unless you happen to know that Book 13 is Sutures. Since you’re hanging out at the DWD blog, it’s probably safe to assume that you do.

Anyway, the ebook will be unofficially released tomorrow. You can get it in the LAC bookstore. The paperback will be officially released in January 2012.

There’s a link over yonder to the sample chapters. The book cover is below. Click it for the big one.

LAC 13 book cover

 

And, between you and me… She lopped off the epilogue she had nearly finished, claiming it was nonessential to the story. However, it’s essential to me, so I will see what I can do about getting her to finish it. She should hand it over to you as an outtake if nothing else.

 

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Comeuppance

Uh, remember when we issued that D Double D dare to our dear author? Yeah, she did it and broke the half-mil ceiling. You’d think she’d simply have galumphed on her merry way. But, oh, not Roz.

It seems this morning she signed up for National Novel Writing Month, with the goal of writing 50,000 words during the month of November. She’s taken “rebel” status—I’m sure that surprises everyone—because she intends to work on something already in progress, rather than on something “from scratch” as the rules dictate. That in-progress thing would be Sutures, book 13, and she has sworn to jump into LAC 14 in her quest for the prize.

That seems like a very lofty goal for one in a slump, but she is a writer, after all. So, at the same time, it makes perfect sense. Except for one itty-bitty snag. And, yes, that involves your beloved DWD.

She has D Double D dared us to behave ourselves for the month of November: to stay on task and not jump ahead; to proceed through Sutures in a linear fashion; to keep at it and not slough off; do what we need to do to complete the weekend; and then do the same for LAC 14. Seriously, she has dared us to behave! Behave! Isn’t that like asking us not to be ourselves or something? Wouldn’t that make us characters out of character? But then again, a dare is a horribly tempting sort of thing, not one we generally pass on, no matter how foolish. Truth be told, though, naked cannonballs sound much easier than this. Even Dare Devil Laura isn’t so cocky on this one, and that should make us all tremble in fear.

Everybody please, please, please cross your fingers on this one! We will never, ever live this down.

So, that little orange bar up yonder gets a new title and a different task. If any of you have a talent for telekinesis, now would be the time to show off.

 

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LAC 11 Chapter 3

Because one of you wrote to Roz: It has been a really l-o-o-o-ong wait, though, you know, and another stolen chapter geting posted wouldn’t really be a catastrophe, would it?

High-five from the DWD! 😀

So let’s find out if my thievery leads to catastrophe or not. I’m thinking not, but you never frickin’ know. If you don’t hear from me again, get Laura on it.

 

Chapter 3

The Red Queen had barely left the building when scouts of the boyish persuasion infiltrated the place. Doubting there was a merit badge for identifying eight Dykes Who Dare in their unnatural habitat, we bailed and took up unruly residence outside.

With a pointing finger, Susan suggested, “How about we go to the little park across the street and figure this out?”

“We can’t,” I said. “If we have to move as a pawn, we can only go forward.”

“This is going to be a long weekend.”

“Remind me again why we let them do this to us.”

Impatiently flicking her wrist, Laura said, “There are benches on the side of the building. Let’s go there.”

Just then, a bus pulled away from the curb, and through a cloud of stinky exhaust, we followed Laura. As soon as we rounded the building and saw the benches, we hightailed it. We claimed two that faced each other, a mud-puddled sidewalk between. We all put forearms to thighs and leaned in to consult.

Continue reading LAC 11 Chapter 3

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LAC 11 Chapter 2

Ha! Roz looked away, and I nabbed Chapter 2. May posting this one serve as dynamite up the literary buttock. Although, she did finally write the line that opened the door to the next leg of our journey. We are on the move once again.

 

Chapter 2

Fifteen minutes later, we slid into the huge corner booth at Stacked. The word “coffee” resounded seven times, and Earl’s name tagged along for the ride to the waitress’ order pad. Claudia’s hand came to rest on my thigh, and I placed my own over hers. At least for the moment, life proved good.

We studied the menu, mindful to stay on gift-certificate budget, in case the game came down to that ten bucks I had been foolish enough to dwindle.

Soon, the waitress returned with several carafes. The word “pancakes” resounded seven times, and “tofu scramble” hitchhiked without incident.

Coffee was poured, and we drifted into an agreeable silence. Collectively, we seemed to insist the occasion was ordinary, that we were not in the clutches of riddling professors—clutches so tight they could have strangled our reality, if we let them. Yet, all the while, everyone’s eyes flitted among the many patrons in that restaurant, no doubt looking for the pawn we were certain was there to give us a clue. With my back to the room, I did my spying via the massive mirror on the wall, and not a damn thing caught my attention.

When the food arrived, we intently ate, again appearing as though we hadn’t a care in the world. Once sated, we quickly stacked our dishes and slid them to the outside of the table, and a perceptive busboy appeared and took them away. Seconds later, the waitress showed up with more coffee. She placed the bill tray on the table, which Laura, holder of the almighty gift certificate, immediately pulled in her own direction.

Daring to hurl us back to Ginny and Kris’ world, Janice asked, “Anybody have any idea what we’re up against?”

“Chess.”

Through the Looking-Glass.”

“Both.”

“First, I think we have to figure out how to make the map into a chessboard,” Maggie said and tossed the thing in my direction.

I agreed and spread out the map on the table. “Does anybody have a pencil?”

A few affirmed possession and seized purses, but Janice loudly said, “You might do best to use mine. My instructions said to bring a notebook and a pencil. No flippin’ clue why, but here it is.”

A toss and a roll brought me the pencil. A stretch and a tilt brought seven surveyors with a keen interest in a hometown that suddenly felt foreign.

“Grant Avenue and Lancaster Street,” I said with an eventual stab. “We’re here.” I drew an X on the spot. “This is e1.”

“So are the chessboard squares buildings or blocks or what?”

Laura quickly rattled off the other businesses on the block, six in all, and it seemed obvious we weren’t talking buildings.

“Shit, it is blocks.”

“City blocks.”

“Eight city blocks by eight city blocks.”

“Sixty-four blocks? You’ve got to be kidding!”

“We can’t walk sixty-four blocks! We’ll die.”

Continue reading LAC 11 Chapter 2

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