Check out that little NaNo badge over yonder. It now says “Winner.” Apparently, you are all butt-shover extraordinaries!

She blasted the 50,000 cap this evening, five days ahead of schedule. Still a lot of work to do on the book, and, Jesus, she still hasn’t even let us go to bed on our Saturday night! Maybe she will now that she can relax about it all. We’ll give her a well-earned day off and then back at it.

Anyway, thanks for your butt shoves. 🙂

She has 6,858 words to go to hit the NaNo goal. You’d think that’d be like a spit in the proverbial bucket, but she’s running out of steam spit. She’s missed her daily goals two out of the last 3 days. No shit! Cookies aren’t helping. Coffee isn’t helping. Even cheesecake isn’t enough incentive. She’s tired, and, holy shit, we’re tired, too.

So…

Imagine we’re all on a very loooong toboggan together: the author, the DWD, and all of you who can’t help but love us. We’re aimed downhill, but the thing just frickin’ isn’t going to go. Everyone needs to butt shove, that little maneuver you do in sync that pushes it along until it can get sliding on its own and then whoosh!

That’s where we are: stuck on the very tip of the good kind of downhill slide.

Everybody—and I do mean everybody—do a mental butt shove. Just get us over the hump! We need the whoosh! Please, oh please, oh please, we need the whoosh.

On the count of three…

No, we’re not talking about money for the vending machine. We’re talking the author having completed 75% of the NaNo goal. She’s even ahead of schedule.

I have a sneaking suspicion, though, that Lore Mongers is going to be longer than she figured. (Doesn’t that just figure?) There are a couple of holes (gaping holes) so we kind of lost track of official chapter numbers. I’d guess we’re in Chapter 9. It’s Saturday evening, and we have a ways to go before we can even hit the hay. This one could end up surpassing L-Word C-Word and become the longest of them all. I would not, however, bet three quarters on it. The editor will still need to be unleashed.

Well, a third of November has now passed. She’s a bit ahead of schedule but not as much as she hoped to be. She missed a day’s goal because she had to go out of town. That’s forgivable to all but her.

Lore Mongers is shaping up rather nicely, though. We’re about a quarter of the way through Chapter 5. Janice just did something quite mischievous, and we’re waiting to find out what the repercussions are.

It has been a grueling ten days. We’re putting our feet up, and we’re in need of a stiff drink. Bloody Marys with sanguinary humdinger brines. Someone grab that fifth of vodka, and, Jesus, hide the tequila from the author. No NaNoBoozO. At least not yet anyway.

Cheers. 🙂

Okay, she finally hit the millionth word. It is “right,” and it belongs to the mouthy redhead. Doesn’t that just figure? Not sure if the word is boring or appropriate. Both? Neither? I was kind of hoping for “Claudia” or “Symbiotic” or “Swill” or “ta-da” or “oo, oo, baby, roll over here.”

Well, her NaNo day is not yet over so I best head on back to that place where Ginny and Kris have taken us. Did I just hear the crack of the almighty whip?

Carmel corn, cupcakes, candy, and coffee.

Okay, that’s actually five c-words, but four c-things … unless, of course, you’re eating caramel with a side of corn. If you are, you have problems.

Okay, I’m already way off track here. I came to give you an update, and those four c-things create the fuel that has kept her on target and gotten us into Chapter 2. Ginny and Kris are about to divulge how they’re going to torture us for the weekend. Wish us luck.

And, if the author doesn’t go into sugar shock, she should be able to write tomorrow and hit that cool million. She has 1,031 to go. I am going to pay close attention and see what exactly that millionth word ends up being. It could be as boring as “the” or something as basic LAC as f-er. You really frickin’ never know.

There are only a few hours left before NaNoWriMo begins and the author can finally put fingers to keyboard. There are not too many things worse than a writer who cannot write … okay, except maybe Susan singing Kumbaya. I still have nightmares about that. But anyway, Hallow’s Eve becomes NaNo Eve, and we’re not sure whether to be excited, supportive, or run for the frickin’ hills.

Right before dropping to her knees to pathetically beg, she gave us the mother of all lectures on how this wasn’t simply her attempting a literary stunt. She, in fact, believes … or wants to believe … or desperately needs to believe that there are 11 of us about to bungie jump off a wordy cliff. She has asked us to step up and let our weekend play out in a linear and coherent manner. We have been warned about tangents. (Tangents? Us?) We have been instructed to stay with this book and not jump into any others. She says we can be our obnoxious selves as long as it pertains to Lore Mongers. Then, she bribes us with cookies and ice cream. That worked rather well, but then I think she wondered how we’d be after the sugar buzz wore off, and, yes, that was when she dropped to knees.

So, it would seem that at this moment in time, we hold enormous sway. That elicits temptations galore, but we’ll let that sway swell for a bit and prepare to jump with her. (I hate heights, did you know that?)

Cross your fingers—for her and us. Wish her a good night’s sleep, and, Jesus, somebody hide the candy. When she awakens tomorrow morning, we shall once again be the center of attention. Let the LAC weekend begin.

Oh, and keep an eye on that NaNo counter over there. It had damn well better move each night, or we will be running for the hills. Oh, and the cool mil… If she keeps up with the daily minimum of 1,667 words, she should be reaching that big milestone on Sunday or Monday.

There we were: having fallen off the face of the earth. Scary prospect. But, alas, we are still kickin’ in our usual obnoxious style. I’m sure you consider yourselves blessed. 🙂

Anyway, the author has been very busy with her own life lately and not just ours. However, she has been working on LAC 16 research and plotting, and odds are good she will grab that accumulation of work to land prepared on this first day of NaNoWriMo, November 1st. Last year she didn’t decide/commit until the mid-morning of and then spent the rest of the month scrambling, starving, and screaming. She even had to accept “rebel status” because she used a project she had already begun work on (Sutures), and when she finished that one, she jumped onto the fresh page of a new story she hadn’t even had time to think of. Oh yes, the author was very ill-prepared, and saved, if I remember correctly, by a tangent of Laura’s and mine … something to do with a moron in a barrel. She did reach the goal of 50,000 words.

With that 20/20 hindsight stuff, she’s planning on being thoroughly prepared this time and on starting LAC 16 from word one. We’re placing bets in here on whether or not that preparation will actually prevent the scrambling, starving, and screaming. I haven’t yet decided where I’m placing my coffee money. She can be very quiet and disciplined on some occasions, but I think maybe at her core she has that “hurts-so-good” kind of process. We shall see. Regardless, somewhere in there she will reach her own goal of 1,000,000 words.

So… LAC 16 is a Kris and Ginny weekend. God help us all. We’re traveling out of town, but I won’t say where, but, no, it’s not Crappie Cabin. Oh, and its title gets an L-Word+1.

Things to look forward to … like a parachute opening at the very last second.

Okay, with Smooched officially finished, her word count is 993,314 and 6,686 to go. The screeching halt continues.

A warm birthday wish goes out to Scooter … and a little sympathy for her not having reached the goal on his birthday. If he’s declawed, we’d give him birthday high-fives. Well, except for Laura, who’d probably do so anyway, catty being that she is.